45. Q: We believe we can picture it.
A: THIS IS A BODILY IMAGE OF OVERVIEW
NOTICE TWO THINGS ABOUT [THE] FIGURE
46. Q: Tell us the first.
A: ITS ATTITUDE IS ORIENTED UPWARD INTO JOY &
EXULTATION OR EXALTATION
Words [Scribe] had explicitly ascribed to me, especially after
writing Cherubic Hymns.
47. Q: He is not looking upward. [That's me quite uncomfortable with the direction
the conversation has gone.]
A: [NO] BUT HIS LINES OF ENERGY ARE RADIATING UPWARD
LIKE A RISING SUN LIKE A GLAD DAY
48. Q: And the second thing to notice?
A: HIS POSTURE IS A MODIFIED VERSION OF LEONARDO’S
IDEAL FIGURE BALANCED WITHIN A CIRCLE & A SQUARE
[Scribe] also was the one who connected Albion to Leonardo’s
drawing. This was our first board reference to the Renaissance Man.
49. Q: Indicating what?
A: MAAT WITHIN EXALTATION
BALANCE WITHIN [THE] ASCENT
Ma’at is my chosen facet of study (hopefully mastery one day).
50. Q: So ma’at is an element within overview?
A: [YES] THAT IS WHY THE [another symbol for Albion] IS A
FIGURE FOR KEEN SIGHTED JUDGMENT
51. Q: None of these things is associated with immersion (ma’at, ascent,
exultation, brightness).
A: [NO] IMMERSION IS DOWNWARD DARK PRIVATE
AND APT TO UNSETTLE MAAT
Mt. Snowdon
52. Q ([Scribe]): When you mention “balance with ascent,” I think of the
funicular in [Albion]’s dream leading to the top of Mt. Snowdon.
A: IS IT [NO]T A DREAM OF [THE] PATH YOU’LL MEANT TO TAKE?
An important dream (Mt. Snowdon: see Appendix). As with
several of my others, [Scribe] is the one who chooses to mention it at
the board.
[Editor's Note (2018): This is not a dream I remembered until
going back to my dream journal, and it's not worth reprinting here. The
key element is that I was in a funicular station wanting to go up to the
top of a foreign mountain, a special place, but the schedule was unclear,
irregular; there were language barriers. I had to be somewhere relatively
soon, perhaps home for supper. Apparently I'd visited the summit long
before, but now I was choosing to decline, as time was short. If I went up,
I'd only get a peek at the peak; then I'd have to come right back. The title
comes from exiting the dream, as though leaving my body to orbit, as I
found myself first above a map of Scotland, then all of Britain, then
spotting a blinking light (X marks the spot) over northern Wales.
It is true that in real life I had indeed climbed Mt. Snowden, in 1987
with my wife b.c. (before children). We started from a working shepherd's
ranch at its base, where we spent a few nights and where English was
very much a foreign language. Setting out in a chill morning fog,
Wordsworth on my mind, we arrived at the summit in the early afternoon,
still thick in fog, only to be surprised (stunned) & disappointed to find
a rather raucous party at the top: a loud bar with heavy drinking, food,
and a funicular running down the spine of the mountain back. Chug! Chug!
We forced down a pint & quickly descended back into the fog, which
lifted about halfway down. A fantastic day in every aspect, except, in
fact, the view from the summit.]
53. Q ([Scribe]): In the dream, [Albion]’s representative delays.
A: YOU UNDERSTAND YOUR SITUATION AT [THE] DREAM LEVEL
NOW MAKE IT REAL TO YOUR WAKING SELF
Lunar Judgment
54. Q: What is lunar judgment as opposed to plain judgment?
A: AN EXAMPLE?
55. IMAGINE YOURSELF JUDGING A DISPUTE BETWEEN
CONTENDING PARTIES IN WAKING LIFE
YOU MUST ATTEND TO THEIR PLEAS & SEE THEIR
CIRCUMSTANCES
CLEARLY THIS IS PLAIN
56. IN [THE] LUNAR REALM YOU ARE ALSO IN [THE] MIDST
OF CONTENDING VOICES
ATTEND TO THEM
WHICH OFFER INSIGHT? WHICH DELUSION?
I now liken the process to a monkey’s swinging through the
forest, instantaneously dropping one vine just in time to catch another.
Or, in my own experience, my ability to cross difficult streams (that
others find impossible) by means of leaping among irregular stones.
This requires from me no more than the first leap: after this, my body
just takes over.
57. Q: Albion & the Scribe each take a path around the eye. What do Jane &
Anand do?
A: I CANNOT SPEAK FOR MY POSSIBLE FUTURE SELF
BUT WE KNOW THAT ANAND IS [THE] EXPERT IN IMMERSION
58. Q: Will you in time have to pick one or the other path?
A: [NO] BECAUSE [THE]SE TWO PATHS DO NOT EX…
59. HAUST [THE]
POSSIBILITIES
[THE]RE ARE MANY METHODS FOR NON-FLYERS
THE EYE IS YOUR PAIR
So there are many dualities, and interestingly it may not be
required for our mandala to include both halves of the duality.
Furthermore, at least in this case, [Scribe] & Anand appear not to be so
“vastly unlike” as mandala mates are prone to be.
60. Q: Suppose that [Albion] fails to emerge from the well in time, how would
this affect [Scribe]?
A: VERY SIMPLY HE LOSES ACCESS TO [THE] FACE YOU
MIGHT HAVE WORN
HE LOSES [THE] CONVERSATION IN TIME
Sad, but at least I don’t bring down the whole karass.
61. Q: Parting words?
A: YOU ARE ON [THE] THRESHOLD OF SHEER DARKNESS
PLEASE BELIEVE THIS
JANE
Dear Reader, I ask you to imagine how such words would make
you feel.
Leonardo's Vitruvian Man, a self-portrait, c. 1491
6c: Session 45
Images & Attributions (in order of appearance)
1. Banner: Rhiannon C. 2016
a) Jewel Mandala (2): D.C. Albion 1994
2. "Glad Day" or "The Dance of Albion," William Blake, c.1794
https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/4/47/William_Blake_-_Albion_Rose_-_from_A_Large_Book_of_Designs_1793-6.jpg
2. Vitruvian Man by Leonardo da Vinci: 600px-Da_Vinci_Vitruve_Luc_Viatour.jpg
2. "Glad Day" or "The Dance of Albion," William Blake, c.1794
https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/4/47/William_Blake_-_Albion_Rose_-_from_A_Large_Book_of_Designs_1793-6.jpg
8. (glyph) Mickey Mouse as "The Sorcerer's Apprentice," Walt Disney, ©The Disney Company
The Table of Contents below is too long to display fully. If you click to the right of these Lessons, you'll see the primary source documents displayed under each. These original sessions are a world treasure.
albionspeak: a draught of language (7.1)
SESSION 45: 3RD NIGHT, 6/21/97 (New York)
Tonight’s lesson was to be with my contact, Jane. Based on [Scribe]’s work with [his contact] Anand the previous night, I was expecting to do most of the talking. Because Jane is our “moon” and because Shelley wrote many poems at the end of his life to his own friend Jane, [Scribe] chose for the invocation “Tell me, thou Star.”
10:47 PM
Jane
1. Q: [Guide], are you there?
A: I AM HOVERING ABOVE [THE] LEVEL WATERZ
2. Q: Who is with us?
A: ANAND LISTENS AS JANE TEACHES
3. Q: Jane, Anand taught us about immersion. What do you call the other arm
of the compasses?
A: I CALL IT OVERVIEW
[Our opening exercise the previous nights was to close the arms
of a (circle-drawing) compass.]
This sounded familiar; I knew we’d just heard the term somewhere
during the previous two sessions. [Scribe] & I flipped the pages of the
steno pad, we but could not find the word anywhere. Later we realized
we’d missed it because we’d been scanning only our friends’ responses,
all in upper case, whereas it had been [Scribe] who had first coined (or
divined) the new usage. [cf. 44.9]
Uneclipsing the Moon
4. Q: How should we begin?
A: WITH ANOTHER UNDOING
[NO]T OPENING [THE] COMPASSES
BUT UNECLIPSING A MOON
Another visual exercise -- not pulling, not travelling.
5. Q: What would that look like?
A: SEE [THE] FULLY SHADOWD MOON
[THE]N SLIDE [THE] SHADOW AWAY & LET [THE] FULL
MOON EMERGE
6. Q: As the moon emerges, the planchette will stir?
A: EXACTLY SO - FEEL [THE] SHADOW SLIPPING PAST
We collected ourselves and began. Almost immediately &
without effort I saw the third contact of a lunar eclipse, and following my
memory of my 1991 solar eclipse in Hawaii, the moment of reemergence
was dramatic; the light was brilliant. I was, however, worried that it had
all happened too fast. But then, as if to counter this impression, the
planchette began to move with deliberate slowness.
11:03 PM
7. Q: We are doing so now.
A: RADIANCE [slow movement]
IS THIS NOT LUNAR ATTENTION?
Clearly another oracular pronouncement: a new trend. Our last,
more unofficial lesson with Jane centered on lunar attention.
8. Q: The first glimpse of the moon’s rim was overwhelmingly radiant.
A: THIS IS INSIGHT
THIS IS DIRECT SEEING
Fullness
9. Q: Is the picture a moving picture: catch the rim then follow it to its fullness?
A: FOLLOW AS FAR AS YOU CAN
USUALLY [THE] IMAGE FADES
10. Q: Granted -- but why?
A: BECAUSE [THE] MIND IN TIME HOLDS FULLNESS ONLY WITH
GREAT STRESS
IT IS SO FOR FLYERS AS WELL
It is always interesting to note the limitations of flyers and
geniuses. We understand our own limitations, at least in part, but this
datum sets the ultimate bar slightly more within our reach. Also, to know
that everyone, even Mozart, for example, has to work to maintain his
vision helps me appreciate more each genius as an heroic model. That
is, a difficult task is an heroic task. We know Mozart worked hard;
and yet because he represents the essence of flying, it is easy, as well as
unfair, to discount his very human effort.
The Eye Diagram
11. Q: Is seeing fullness the same as overview?
A: FULLNESS IS [THE] END OF OVERVIEW & IMMERSION ALIKE -
DRAW NOW [THE] OUTLINE OF AN…
12. EYE
[Scribe] does so on our steno pad. Of the many possible eye-outlines
one might draw, [Scribe] draws exactly the one Jane needs for our instruction.
13. Q: Like this?
A: PERFECT
NOW BEGIN AT ONE END
14. Q: And?
A: ALBION DESCRIBES [THE] UPPER LID
WHILE [THE] SCRIBE TRACES [THE] LOWER
15. Q: Is this an illustration or an exercise?
A: A PICTURE DEAR FRIEND OF [THE] DIVERGENCE & EVENTUAL
CONVERGENCE OF TWO PATHS THAT IN COMBINATION
FORM [THE] EYE
THIS PICTURE IS INSCRIBED ON OUR NARROW PASSAGE
Once more [Scribe] & I are counter-poised in duality. Our narrow
passage, recall, is the birth canal which separates the Grotto from our
port of departure and is where generations of forebears inscribe images
of our lives in the Net. [cf. 95: 25.8]
16. Q: Overview is the path described by the upper lid.
Immersion is the path of the lower lid.
A: EXACTLY AND IF YOU ADD [THE] IRIS YOU HAVE ADDED?
17. Q: The iris is whatever you can’t approach directly but must circumscribe.
A: IN A SENSE [THE] IRIS IS LIFE ITSELF -
THINK ABOUT THIS PLEASE
I’LL WAIT
Something we did not catch at the time concerns Jane’s possible
pun on the word “iris.” Recall, Vilansit’s honorific, “many-colour’d
messenger,” came to us via The Tempest. There, the many-colour’d
messenger is Iris, goddess of the rainbow. We found Jane’s waiting (in
eternity) amusing.
18. Q: Is it permitted for you to tell us where we are -- respectively -- along these
two arcs?
A: IT IS NOT ONLY PERMITTED
IT IS NECESSARY
19. Q: Please do.
A: FIRST DRAW TWO PARALLEL & VERTICAL LINES EACH
TOUCHING ONE SIDE OF [THE] IRIS-CIRCLE
20. Q: Like this:
A: NOW LABEL THE TWO UPPER INTERSECTIONS A & B FROM
LEFT TO RIGHT
21. Q: Are the lower ones C & D?
A: THEY ARE
NOW YOU TELL ME WHERE YOU EACH ARE
22. Q: Albion is at A. The Scribe is at D.
A: NOW YOU HAVE A ROUGH PICTURE OF YOUR PROGRESS
Quite a diagram; quite a piece of technical writing on Jane’s part ---
her instructions could not have been clearer. I noted, incidentally,
although this may not be significant, that our respective arcs touched the
iris itself at a single tangential point midway through the paths.
Mathematically, such arcs could have intersected the iris twice each.
23. Q: When did we begin at the leftmost point?
A: AT [THE] MOMENT OF ACCEPTANCE - RECALL
[Albion] AT AGE ELEVEN
[Scribe] MUCH EARLIER?
That is, when we first entered our karass. [Cf. 92: 12.44]
24. Q: We do recall [the discussion not the event]. We assume that advance along
the arc need not proceed at a uniform rate.
A: GOOD HEAVENS NO
WHAT AN IDEA
25. Q: The eye diagram is divided vertically into thirds. Each of us is at the
threshold of a new third.
A: [YES] BUT KEEP IN MIND THAT [THE] SPEED OF ADVANCE
IS NOT INDICATED ON [THE] DIAGRAM
26. Q: So --- hypothetically - one could remain at the threshold for years.
A: IF IT WERE NOT SO YOU WOULD HAVE NO AGENCY
[NO] EXERCISE OF WILL OR CHOICE
27. Q: Your history would be like a stone’s. [Cf. 95: 27.69]
A: A STONE’S SPEED IS ALWAYS PERFECTLY UNIFORM
We understood the diagram; now for the interpretation.
Albion in the Balance
28. Q: Tell us about our thresholds.
A: ALBION FIRST
29. ALBION - YOU HAVE RECORDED OUR LESSONS BUT HAVE NOT
TRULY RECEIVED [THE]M
YOU HAVE [NO]T MADE USE OF WHAT WE HAVE FURNISHED
Yes, I knew this deeply; I was in pain. But why?
30. Q ([Albion]): Have I lacked in quantity of effort or quality of effort?
A: NEITHER - IT IS NOT AN ISSUE OF EFFORT AS SUCH
IT IS AN ISSUE OF ENERGY
IT IS SIMPLY NOT PRESENT BEHIND YOUR INTENT
Yes, again. “Words without thoughts never can Heaven go.” I
knew my many exercises, in tree-seeing for example, were proving futile.
I had been hoping that, like kids learning fractions, developing the good
habit of doing homework would at least provide a place, a condition, for
the right light to come on. But the light was not forthcoming, just as I’ve
seen it fail to come on in a number of nice boys & girls.
31. Q ([Albion]): Is this because [my energy] is being dissipated in my waking life?
A: [NO] IT IS BECAUSE YOU ARE DELAYING AT A DEEP LEVEL
YOU FAIL TO BELIEVE THAT YOUR LIFE IS REALLY IN [THE]
BALANCE
YOU DO NOT REALLY…
32. BELIEVE THAT YOU ARE IN DANGER
33. Q ([Albion]): In danger of falling?
A: IN DANGER OF FALLING ASLEEP AT [THE] BOTTOM OF [THE]
DEEP WELL
This response seems very clear to me now, but at the time, in a
mixed state of attention & perhaps jarred by the severity of the situation, I
simply did not understand what Jane was saying here. [Scribe] showed
some impatience over my confusion. (I forget the exact nature of my
confusion.)
34. Q ([Albion]): Can you clarify?
A: [THE] LONGER YOU REMAIN INERT & UNAWAKE [THE]
GREATER [THE] RISK THAT YOU WILL FAIL TO
EMERGE IN TIME
O.K. Harsh, but I can grasp this. But how to fix it?
35. Q ([Albion]): You say it’s a question of belief. But how does one believe in
something one does not believe in?
A: ONE BELIEVES IN WHAT ONE PERCEIVES AS REAL
YOU MUST LEARN THAT [THE] DANGER IS AS REAL AS A CLIFF
36. Q ([Albion]): How can I see the cliff?
A: FIRST YOU MUST REMOVE AN IMMENSE OBSTACLE
37. Q ([Albion]): What is the obstacle?
A: IT IS YOUR FALSE BELIEF THAT YOU ARE PERFECTLY
FINE WHOLE SANE & GOOD JUST AS YOU ARE
& THAT YOU ARE ALREADY SAFE & SAVED
REGARDLESS OF YOUR ACTS OR ATTIT[ude]
[Scribe] has long pointed out my complacency in this regard. I
often tend to compare myself to “most people;” and by these standards I
look pretty good. I don’t fool myself into thinking I’m amazingly brilliant
(as kids often tell me I am); I have [Scribe] and the world around me to
keep me grounded here. But I do tend to think I am sane & good -- that
considering my non-flyer limitations, I show good sense and moral fiber.
Now I see this is just bullshit. I’m not as good as I can be; I’m not
particularly charitable, for instance. I also know I’m not sane or well
either. Scratch the surface, and I harbor thoughts which terrify me (How
can I!). Comparing myself to anybody is an error. I know that in not
moving forward I’m feeling the pain of being trapped. I do realize
something is deeply wrong -- every action requires a greater exertion, a
greater effort in tolerance, more resentment at giving of myself. This is
not healthy. But it’s so hard to change! I keep waiting for the right door
to open and for someone to invite me in. [Scribe] had the advantage of
brutal aloneness, just [Scribe] and his mediocre poetry to kick his ass to
the next level. But I am entangled in a web of commitments I can just
barely satisfy, where I ultimately cannot do well at anything. I have
many reactions to such a desperate state: screaming or crying might be
the healthiest -- but I am incapable of this. Bearing down & getting
tough is what I’m trying today (3/7/98), but for most of 1997 I just got
ever more tired. I’d make an effort and then lapse for a while, rise to the
challenge and then fall for a longer interval. Eternal vigilance is not possible.
38. Q ([Albion]): Is the psychological pain that I am in a growing awareness that I
must change?
A: PAIN ALONE CAN BE ENDURED
WHAT YOUR ARE REALLY SENSING IS A DIVERGENCE
BETWEEN WHAT YOU BELIEVE & WHAT YOU
ARE IN FACT EXPERIENCING
More than enough to chew on… [Scribe]’s turn.
The Scribe’s Threshold
39. Q ([Scribe]): Tell the Scribe about his threshold
A: TO PUT IT IN DON’S TERMS YOU NOW HAVE IN SIGHT [THE]
POSSIBILITY - NOT [THE] INEVITABI[li]TY - OF
SWALLOWING YOUR TIGER
While Don, indeed, has been our tiger-swallowing teacher thus
far, Jane is also making use of one of Don’s signature word ambiguities. I
have reproduced above [Scribe]’s written rendition of the response. And
yet if “IN SIGHT” is read as “INSIGHT,” the response still makes good
sense. This was important, though not unexpected news.
40. Q ([Scribe]): Unless you object, this is a topic I will discuss more fully with Josef.
A: IT IS IMPORTANT FOR YOU TO CONFER WITH YOUR TEACHER -
I AM BUT [THE] MESSENGER
I don’t know why [Scribe] chose to forego more of a discussion
here with Jane. I was surprised.
What is Overview?
41. Q: Please tell us more about overview.
A: GLADLY - [a pun, though not visible until A#44]
FIRST KEEP IN MIND THAT WE ARE IN [THE] REALM OF
ANOTH…
42. …[THE]R ATTENTION
OVERVIEW IS LUNAR IN OUR SPECIAL SENSE [NO]T PLAIN
GOOD JUDGMENT & PERSPECTIVE
Here Jane very clearly lets me know that I have some
misconceptions about my own mode. Remember, when [Scribe] asked
me what I would have called overview, my word was “perspective.”
43. Q: That is what it is not -- but tell us what it is.
A: I SHALL -
BUT YOU MUST RATIFY WHAT I SAY WITH YOUR OWN
INTUITIONS
Glad Day
44. Q: As we go.
A: GOOD -
BEGIN WITH BLAKE’S IMAGE OF ALBION
CAN YOU SEE IT?
The Dance of Albion or Glad Day, Blake’s portrait of an eternal
me. [The night before Jane asked us to "take the kite," which was purely
metaphorical, since I could not pack my kite in a suitcase to New York.
We also had no access to Blake's portrait. It is strange, but true, however,
that I can picture this centuries-old painting much better than I can picture
myself in reality. I am so poor at visualizing I can't really see my own face.
Which face? Facial hair? Glasses? Which hair color—I hit many shades of
red—or just the current scraps of white?]